Issue: Why do we feel bad when someone says something bad to us? and what should we do in such situations?
Asked By: Vivek Kumar, Rati Shukla, Luciana Garcia, Natalia Hernandez, Regina miller, Keith Holland , Arun Pathak, and others.
Solutions: Did you ever ask a question to yourself, who are you? If someone asks you this question, you will end up replying with your name but are you just a ‘name’? If you are not just the name then a question arises who are you?
We live our life by our name, our life is like a movie and we are the main character of it. But for a moment just think about it are we really the centre of life or is it just a hallucination that we have since our birth?
At this point of time we don’t know the exact age of our universe however we calculate it as per the technology available right now. As per the ‘Lambda-CDM concordance model’ the evolution of the universe happened from a single point to its present state over a time period of about 13.8 billion years of cosmological time, we still don’t know whether it is true or not. Let’s consider it as true just for the sake of argument still this figure is very big, then the age of our earth is 4.543 billion years which seems a very small number in comparison to the age of the universe, it seems like a bubble in the water, now compare yourself where do you stand? We have no value in comparison of such a vast expansion.
We think of ourselves as we are so important and no one can hurt us by saying something that we don’t like.
All the theory about the universe that I told you was just to make you realize that what the reality is and where exactly do we stand in this universe.
The problem is not what we are the problem is always the lack of knowledge, we are just a drop of water in an endless ocean, we are made of same material as ocean so we do not know the ocean, how can a drop know the ocean? If a drop can think it may think that the ocean is made of billions of drops just like it but the fact is just the opposite of it. For a small drop of water it is everything that it needs, but if we see it has got no importance in comparison to the ocean.
I hope you are getting my point.
You give yourself so much of importance that you forget everything else, you forget how big this stream of life is, and you forget how big this universe is.
“This endless time …and you.”
“This vast phenomenon of life …and you.”
You are still thinking about yourself and you don’t even know who you are.
You should have an open mind to start with, you should not be attached to your so called identity that is your name, understand the fact that you are not your name, you are beyond all this, this body is borrowed from the universe, you only exists for a small fraction of time.
You feel bad if someone says something bad to you because you have created an image of yours in your mind and when some thought enters your mind which does not matches your image you feel offended, your mind tries to keep that image safe from anything that tries to blur the image of yours, For example “bad opinions of others about you”, you simply will try to keep away from those people who talks negative about you or points about your negative traits, instead of listening to them and trying to improve what you can in yourself you will simply avoid them to keep your so called identity safe.
You don’t want to change, why should you? They should change, they are bad people, that’s what you think…am I ‘right’?
Ask them they are the centre of their life as per their opinion, they are the hero of their movie.
Your identity is not even self created; it was created by those who say ‘good’ things about you or I can say your identity is created by those who plant the idea of “You” in you. Your identity is not what you are it is the compilation of the opinions of others.
Don’t get attached to something that is not yours.
Don’t get attached to something that is worthless.
Your identity has no value, it is fake…!!!
See the bigger picture, know what exists and what diminishes, and know what remains.
There is nothing to do when someone says something bad to you, only thing you can do is to know yourself. Knowing yourself is not something you “can do”.
We can only accept the fact that our identity in the universe is worthless, the moment you accept this fact you will start accepting everything that comes to you, you will start taking life the way it comes to you, be it good or bad now everything becomes acceptable to you and eventually you will be able to see your “self” the true “you”. You reach at a place where there is no more you and I where there is no distinction, no differences. There is only “One”
In order to do something that you can’t “do” yourself, you need understanding, you need knowledge, you need patience.
Let a question arise in your mind that who you really are? You were here even when you had no name.
Go where the life takes you, but don’t take your life for granted it is valuable you have it today who knows what will happen tomorrow? Live your life to the fullest.
At this point of time we are living somehow, we are managing our life not living it.
If you will live your life in a way that when the death comes you will move a step forward towards it and embrace it with all your heart.
The one who is full of life cannot be hurt in anyway; a glass that is already full can’t be filled as it is already full.
Have a blissful life!!